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16: PEOPLE WHO GO THROUGH A TRAIN BARRIER AND THEN STOP AT THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BARRIER TO PUT THEIR TICKET AWAY

I have already discussed people who panic slap Oyster Card readers, but people who stop once they have got through said barrier are equally as irritating.  So flaky and unaware of the people around them, they think nothing of coming to a standstill on the other side of a train barrier to put their ticket away into their wallet.  They often cannot locate their wallet either, which delays things further as they pat each pocket rhythmically for their missing money holder.  Can they not see the queue of people behind them?  Are they not conscious of the fact that they are in a public place, where other people are trying to get from A to B?!? 

And why do the vast majority of people who do this also have suitcases with them?  Massive suitcases too.  The sort that, if they hit you accidentally, give you a bruise so big it looks like you’ve been abused by Mike Tyson (not that he abuses people of course…).  And the ultimate insult is when these suitcases don’t even make it through the barrier before it closes on them, adding to the frustration of the other passengers, who must now lift the suitcase over the barricade for the inept passenger in an effort to speed up their own exit from the tube.  And then, just when you think you’ve finally cleared your route of any idiotic obstacles, suitcase man stops again, reunited with his luggage, in the worst possible place.  And all to put his ticket away.  And the whole system breaks down.

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About Twenty8Later

A brand new podcast mocking news, sport & entertainment in handy 28-day chunks. Good times in a terrible, terrible world.

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