In an effort to make more money from their already increasingly dumbed down, idiotic TV shows, production companies are now resorting to running competitions where viewers can win a BIG prize. Their hope is that that muggings at home will ignore the fact that calls cost seven quid a minute and ring up for the chance to win something usually as shit as a George Foreman grill. Which is good of them.
Now I know society is fucked. I know that you can’t walk down a street anymore without seeing someone who looks like they’ve had their brains sucked out fo their arses. I know that the vast majority of people on this planet would rather mug you than strike up a gentile conversation, but must television really give up on the rest of us and focus its energy on the thickest of the thick?? These comeptition questions are beyond easy. Your dog could answer them. It’s embarrassing.
I recently had the misfortune to watch Dickinson’s Real Deal, an antiques show presented by an oversized, coiffured amber turd.
Dickinson gave his viewers the chance to win a prize, something antiquey and old. Now if there is one genre of TV programming that attracts a middle class, educated, intelligent audience it’s antiques shows. Perhaps, at last, this competition would be quite challenging, I thought. Perhaps Dickinson’s Real Deal would go against the grain, I thought. Perhaps it would challenge the little grey cells, I thought. And then the question appeared on screen:
Contact lenses are used to improve what? Is it:
Fucking hell. We’re all doomed.