I hate having a bad lunch. You work all morning with a view to your lunch, and then when you eat it, it’s crap.
I had a wrap from Pret the other day. A crap wrap. Hummus. The first bite was delicious. The second less so. Why? Because all the way through the fucking wrap was a strip of cucumber. There was no warning about this. Nothing on the packet told me of such a sinful addition to my lunch. And so I had no choice but to eat this green, watery beast – the taste equivalent of a bogey in your Big Mac. Or thinking about it, the taste equivalent of a Big Mac.