137: ONLY HAVING 2% LEFT ON YOUR SKY+ BOX

This is a terrifying moment.

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80: JAMES PATTERSON

Here we have an author responsbile for some absolutely brilliant books – the sort of novels that could take a literary fool by the scruff of the neck and throw them with verve and vigour into the nearest library.

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75: THE NEW SUPERMAN COSTUME

Superman is one of the world’s best-loved characters.  He has been an integral part of many peoples childhoods since his creation in the late 1930’s, and has been successfully portrayed in film by the much missed Christopher Reeve, an actor who was born to play The Man of Steel.   

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65: WIGS

I know losing your hair must be tough.  Mine is one the way out at the front.  It must be tough to accept that you have more hair on your arse than on your head.  But please, don’t go down the wig route.  It’s embarrassing.

PS, I love SIR TERRY WOGAN.  He’s allowed a wig.

63: SMART ALEC CONTINUITY ANNOUNCERS

Why do TV channels think anyone at home enjoys some smug wanker giving us their views on programmes before telling us what’s on next.  Coming up with lame jokes and being overly chatty and matey – I don’t know you, I don’t want to know you, stop talking to me through my fucking TV set.

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62: HARRY POTTER FANS

I’m sure the Harry Potter books are really good. I’m sure that they’re as enjoyable for adults as they are for children. And I’m sure that the end of the Potter saga came as a blow to many loyal fans who have grown up with the little scar-faced runt.

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